Tues., Sept. 14, 2010 - Hardee's belated birthday

On Sunday, Sept 12th, Hardee turned five and a half.  Since we don't know how long HH will grace us with his presence, we celebrate these little milestones.  He is the love of our lives, and of course, we want him with us forever but we know that is not realistic.  Until then, we will treasure him as long as we can, though it will never ever be long enough.

We spent Thurs. through Sat. at Lake Castaic in So. Cal. setting up and practicing for our breed water trial.  While there, Hardee started to get sores (ulcers) on the outside of his face.  He also had an ulcer under his ear flap on his head at the top of his ear.  Ulcers were not supposed to happen on the outside of his face, but neither was there supposed to be any hair loss.  Because Hardee had open wounds, we pulled him from the trial because he shouldn't be in the dirty lake water. 

By Saturday afternoon, Hardee also had an infection in his right eye.  Since this was the eye that got radiated, I started to panic that this might indicate that HH was going to lose that eye, which was a slim possibility from the radiation.  At the end of Sat., I abandoned my volunteer job at the water trial (so very sorry to everyone, especially Susan) and took HH back to the hotel and called Dr. Proulx.

Dr. Proulx continues to be shocked by all the side effects that Hardee has experienced that other dogs have not.  I have to keep reminding myself that Hardee is only the third dog that Dr. Proulx has radiated with the gamma knife radiation for a nasal tumor, so they don't have a lot of statistics to go by as far as side effects are concerned.  He thinks that maybe the radiation irritated his eye enough to cause the infection.  The infection then spread to Hardee's other eye with all the rubbing that Hardee does on his face.  Dr. P does NOT think that this infection is indicative of Hardee losing his eye, thank goodness.  We might have to take another trip to Carlsbad, CA for Dr. Proulx to get a look at him and to get some pictures for his files.

For Hardee's 5.5 year birthday, we spent the morning in the hotel waiting for his prescriptions to be filled for pick up.  Then, we checked out and headed home missing the last day of the water trial.  Hardee had an In-n-Out Burger for his birthday celebration the night before.  Conveniently, HH's favorite fast food was just across the street from the hotel.

Hardee's eyes are looking better and the ointment seems to be working, but his hair loss seems to get worse by the day.  By the time of our breed National Specialty, I'm not sure what he'll look like.  I know it doesn't matter how he looks, but I wish, going to our first breed Specialty where most people will see Hardee for the first time, that he looked his usual handsome self.  When you do see him, don't judge his appearance too harshly.  He doesn't seem to know and is his usual confident, happy, self.

Hardee still seems to be in pain.  Even on the pain pills, he rubs and paws at his face frequently.  Last night he pawed at his face for quite awhile before finally settling into sleep.  This morning at our obedience lesson he didn't want to hold his dumbbell, still.  I had forgotten to give him his pain pill before we went to obedience.  I usually give it to him with his breakfast, but on obedience lesson day, he works for his breakfast.  My brain wasn't functioning correctly at 5 a.m. this morning trying to make our 6 a.m. lesson, so he didn't get his pill.  Because he was in pain, he'd run out to pick the dumbbell up but would mouth it and drop it before I could take it from him.  Hopefully it won't turn into some ugly habit that I'll have to train away.  Anyway, I hope we get it fixed before the Specialty when we have to compete. 

Hardee has discharge from his nose and sores on the edge of his right nostril and up into his nose.  I'm hoping they will be healed and the drainage will be done before the Specialty.  Then all we'll have to plan is Hardee's "comb over" to try and camouflage is bald and thinning spots on his face and head.

In my concern for Hardee, I have shirked some of my duties.  I've let the pressure of the situation get to me, and my emotions have come forth.  I've been through some despair and lost hope a couple of times.  I've not always been the nicest in the stress of the moment.  For these downfalls I'm truly sorry, and I hope to be forgiven by those I've let down or offended.

We love Hardee so much and only want the best for him and his health.  We hope we shower him with love every day enough to last a lifetime and beyond.  It won't be enough for Jim and I, but we hope it is for Hardee.

Until then, it is all about joy and all about Hardee!!